Living Vicariously As A Peripatetic Shutterbug

{ More musings from the Cantankerous Old Mule }

The ongoing saga of Buttercup, the lemon of a scooter

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Me with my special pollution-repelling mask.

Some said she was the fastest scooter in the district. Some said she was the most beautiful, the most striking, the strongest horse in the stable …

But I’m not one of those. After two weeks of owning her, and putting her through a beating on these cobblestoned streets, I took her in for a bit of a tune up and reassembly last week. That day she wasn’t Buttercup, but very much “The Lemon”.

They rebuilt the front wheel hub, redid the brakes, replaced a rearview mirror, looked at the electrical system and got the speedometer and headlight working again. I forget what else.

And then, on Tuesday I went out for a quick spin to get some drinks for supper and broke down outside the local pizza place.

I tried kick starting her, I cajoled and spoke sweet nothings to her, I tried kicking her … But nothing would get her going again. And so I pushed her all the way home to the Midges.

“Where were you, what happened, why are you so sweaty?” all the boys asked in unison.

And so I recounted my sorry tale to them, and showed them how she wouldn’t start. At which point she did, the wicked piece of metal that she is. I promptly downed the panaché that I’d bought to have at dinner, so parched was I.

Since then I’ve mostly managed to get her going by kickstarting her but the electronic starter is no more. I have one more week on her warranty – I’ll be making full use of that next week.

As I write this I’m waiting for a gap in the rain (after getting caught in a thunderous storm while puttering home on her) so I can go out to grab some lunch. See you on the other side.

Now what is wrong up there?

Now what is wrong up there?

Rebuilding the front wheel hub

Rebuilding the front wheel hub


2 comments on “The ongoing saga of Buttercup, the lemon of a scooter

  1. derekmidgley
    March 8, 2015

    Brilliant. For a moment I thought I’d stumbled onto the script of an old episode of Topgear, Madagascar!

    • kvennarad
      March 8, 2015

      Clarkson: “This is undoubtedly the worst method of transport… in the world!”

      May: “Oh c*ck!”

      Hammond: “I don’t believe it! You left me stranded in the jungle for three weeks! THREE WEEKS! You had the best off-road vehicles in the world, and you took THREE WEEKS to get to me!”

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This entry was posted on March 7, 2015 by in Humour and tagged .
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